Barbarian Days: A Surfing Life

“Everything out there was disturbingly interlaced with everything else. Waves were the playing field. They were the goal. They were the object of your deepest desire and adoration. At the same time, they were your adversary, your nemesis, even your mortal enemy. The surf was your refuge, your happy hiding place, but it was also a hostile wilderness—a dynamic, indifferent world.”

The author reflects on how surfing differs fundamentally from other sports in that surfers pursue waves but also respect their power and understand their inherent danger. His description of the surf as a “refuge” and “happy hiding place” ties in with his view of the ocean as an escape.

“But, to my sorrow, I was coming into my own as a babysitter. My parents, ignorant of my budding career as a Kaimuki gangbanger, knew me only as Mr. Responsible. That had been my role at home since shortly after the others started arriving […] I could be counted on to keep the little ones undrowned, unelectrocuted, fed, watered, rediapered. But formal babysitting duties, evenings and weekends, were a new thing, and a terrible imposition, I found, when there were waves to ride, city buses begging to be pelted with unripe mangoes, unchaperoned parties to attend in Kaimuki.”

The author’s memories of being “Mr. Responsible” as the oldest child at home help convey his family’s dynamics. By discussing the “terrible imposition” of household responsibilities, Finnegan shows why he treasured his time alone surfing. In addition, in contrasting his family role of responsibility with several decidedly irresponsible activities of youth, the author comments on the difficulties associated with growing up and experiencing the urge for rebellion and freedom.

“This was the fear line that made surfing different, here underscored extra-heavily. I felt like Pip, the cabin boy in Moby Dick who falls overboard and is rescued but loses his mind, undone by visions of the ocean’s infinite malice and indifference. I paddled far, far around the Rice Bowl reef, on the Tongg’s side, light-headed, humiliated, back to shore.”

Finnegan recalls surfing at the “Rice Bowl” for the first time and encountering its powerful waves. Unable to surf on them, Finnegan paddled out of the reef to a calmer area. This quotation shows how Finnegan was free to take significant risks, which helped him understand his skill level and the ever-present danger of the ocean.