The Impossible Knife of Memory

The Impossible Knife of Memory is a realistic fiction novel for young adult readers written by Laurie Halse Anderson and published in 2014. Anderson is a multiple award-winning author of young adult fiction, including the novels Speak and Chains. Anderson’s novels often discuss difficult topics in a way that is appropriate for younger audiences. The Impossible Knife of Memory is narrated by Hayley, a high school student whose father is haunted by war. Hayley and her father struggle to survive their pasts and their memories. In showing Hayley’s experiences adjusting to life in high school and watching her father’s mental health crisis unfold, the novel shows the power of memory, the trauma of war, and the complexity of families.

A New York Times best seller, the novel was also longlisted for the National Book Award and named Best Young Adult Book of 2014 by Publishers Weekly and The School Library Journal. This study guide refers to the 2014 edition published by Viking.

Content warning: The Impossible Knife of Memory contains discussions of substance use, suicide, and violence.

Plot Summary

The Impossible Knife of Memory is narrated by Hayley Kincain, a 17-year-old high school student. The novel is the story of her senior year of high school. It begins with Hayley in detention. She is struggling in school, especially math, and does not have a good attitude about it. This is her first year at a traditional high school. For years before this, she drove across the country in an 18-wheeler truck with her dad, Andy, who homeschooled her. They have since moved back to Andy’s childhood home, where Hayley spent her early youth, so she can have a more normal life.

Hayley has reestablished a friendship with her childhood friend and neighbor, Gracie. However, Hayley does not remember much at all about her childhood. She chooses to “not remember,” which is different than simply forgetting. She meets an interesting classmate, Finn, who wants her to write an article for the school newspaper, but she refuses. Ms. Benedetti, her guidance counselor, is concerned about Hayley’s academics and home life. She wants to talk to Andy, but Hayley does not want her to. Andy is a veteran of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and suffers from PTSD. He has not been working, and Hayley is concerned about his increased drinking.

Finn continues to ask Hayley to write the article and gives her rides in his car. Hayley is more concerned about her dad’s well-being than school; she grows increasingly worried when she sees he cleaned all of his guns. She is jealous of her peers who seem to have normal lives.

Hayley finally writes the article, and her math teacher assigns Finn as her tutor, so they start spending more time together. Finn takes Hayley on a surprise date to a football game. Meanwhile, her dad’s close army friend Roy visits with other soldiers. Roy is concerned about Andy. After he leaves, Andy’s behavior worsens. During an argument with Hayley, he gets physical with her for the first time, grabbing her sweatshirt.

For the first time, Hayley and her dad go to the cemetery to visit her grandma and mom’s graves. Andy becomes even more reclusive after their visit. Finn regularly drives Hayley to school, and they form a romantic relationship. At Hayley’s request, they go to the quarry, where she almost falls in, perhaps on purpose. Hayley learns that Finn and Gracie are both dealing with family issues of their own.

On Halloween night, Hayley is shocked to see Andy’s ex-girlfriend Trish having dinner at their house. Hayley hates Trish and thinks she is a drunk. She wants to run away from home, but Finn convinces her to stay. She confronts her memories of her childhood, remembering how Trish used to be like a mom to her; she hates Trish because she left Hayley behind. Trish tells Hayley that she is back because Roy contacted her about Andy’s condition. On Veterans Day, Andy dresses in his uniform and goes to Hayley’s school, which surprises and pleases her, but that night he gets into a drunken bar fight, and Trish leaves. On another night, Hayley has to pick Andy up at a bar because he is so drunk he does not know where he is.

Hayley dumps Finn out of anger and stress. One day after school, she finds her dad bloodied on the floor and the house wrecked. Andy got drunk and destroyed things because he learned that his friend Roy died on deployment. When two drug dealers will not leave her house, Hayley calls Trish and the police for help. She makes up with Finn, and he teaches her how to swim.

Andy goes missing after Christmas, after gifting his medals and wedding rings to Hayley. She knows that means he plans to kill himself. She finds him at the quarry and begs him not to jump. He saves her from falling, but they both are injured. He makes efforts to improve his health, and Hayley decides to attend college away from home. She is happier and more hopeful.